Ignored Instructions

My favorite way to feel close to God has always been by writing down things I am learning about Him as well as areas I am growing or struggling.  I haven't written in right at a year, which is an honest insight to where my faith has been over the last year.  

To be honest, I have spent the better part of last year dealing with some anger towards God.  There were so many nights of begging God to answer me and not understanding why it felt like He was not helping me out in the slightest.  I prayed for Him to show me how to handle situations and for clarity on the direction that my life was going.  I wanted an audible "yes this is correct", but instead I misunderstood His "no" and confused it for silence.

Truthfully looking back at myself this time last year, the best example I can give is someone angrily throwing tools across the room because they can't figure out how to build the piece of furniture... with the instructions sitting unread and ignored next to them.

Was I having an adult temper tantrum of my own causing? Perhaps.

I KNOW the Bible is important.  I KNOW that it is God's Word.  But the issue was that it wasn't matching up with how I thought things should go, so it got left sitting unread and ignored on my nightstand for too long.  I wanted certain things to mold to fit my life so that God would "okay" them, so I convinced myself I was giving it to God when instead I was allowing myself to cherry-pick what I wanted to get out of His word. 

How many times do we want something so bad that we pray about it without actually looking to see what He has written down already?

Struggling with knowing the next steps you should take or how to achieve big goals?  What is your motivation in what you are trying to accomplish?  No matter what the task or career is, are you doing it to serve yourself and for recognition or to serve your clients, patients, co-workers, or anyone else that you might encounter? Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. (Proverbs 16:3)

 Struggling with a relationship where you are continuing to get hurt?  Are you chasing someone who is seeking a relationship with God firmly in the center and someone that displays respect to both the Lord and you in all circumstances?  Are you truly seeking God's will, or are you making this person an idol in your life? Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. (Colossians 3:1-6)

Are you struggling with having a difficult time figuring out why God has you in the season of life that you are in, no matter what that is? The entire Bible- every single verse in it- points to one purpose, and that is the ability to truly know and be saved by the One that created all.  What are you actively doing in this exact season, no matter how sweet or difficult it is, to spread this knowledge and joy to those around you? Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Truly studying and trusting in God's word in no way makes life easy, but it does allow us to better understand what God is doing in our life and help us avoid attempting to walk without Him.  While the furniture example is light-hearted, becoming angry with God and attempting to walk without Him can lead us to a very dark, hopeless place.  

I have no idea what God has in store for my life in so many areas, and admittedly that can be really scary.  However, God is currently using everything from people, work, and my environment to show me how much sweeter following a plan that lines up with His word can be rather than chasing a plan that I created on my own.