One example that was used over the weekend was a glowstick. In order for it to work, you have to break it so that it will shine. God uses us in the same way; He sees our brokenness but He never hides from it or abandons us; He meets us where we are and is able to shine through our mess.
Being vulnerable. Loving all. Standing up.
These are three truths that I have learned this weekend through the speaker and the small group, and I would love to share what God has shown me!
First of all, being vulnerable is scary. It's laying your heart out for someone to see, knowing that your imperfections and faults are visible. It's about giving someone access to the darkest parts of you and not knowing how they will react. Being vulnerable is is also one of the most joyful things I have ever experienced.
Lately I have been craving people to talk about the hard stuff with, as well as laugh uncontrollably and experience the joys of life together. God in His faithfulness has provided the perfect people to do this with in some of the most unexpected situations and friendships.
Beyond that, God has allowed me to see how He works through our stories. He has showed me that if I go where He calls me, He can use me to talk to others that have similar pains and scars. As a Christian body, it's easy to pretend like life is easier than it actually is. We look around and see how those around us are so "put together", and we become envious of this.
I've learned that more often than not, if we tell these people what we are going through and the messiness of our lives, these "perfect" people are more than likely experiencing similar versions of their own mess. Rejoicing together in how God can overcome our hardships is so much more refreshing than trying to keep up an act of perfection on our own.
Jame 5:16 calls us to this level of accountability and fellowship by saying Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.
As we work on becoming vulnerable, that brings me to the next theme of the week. While we open up to others, it's so important that we open up our hearts and ears in order to receive them as well. Intentionality is vital for Christian fellowship. For a relationship to grow, we need to set aside time from our crazy lives in order to listen to those around us.
God does not necessarily call us to business, and while I don't believe business itself is a problem, it can become sinful when we allow it to become an excuse for not spending time with people God is placing on our hearts. If we know others are hurting, it's important to show the patient love He shows us.
However, not all people will make this time for us. Some people seem harder to love. This can be from hurtful past situations, conflicting personalities, or any other reason.
I am unworthy.
I have messed up and sinned daily, and I don't deserve love from perfection. Despite this, God has been patient with me through my running and He has shown steadfast love. In the same way, we have to continue loving those that are running from us. It's so hard to have hurtful situations and respond in love, but this is exactly what the Lord does for us daily.
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. (John 13:34-35)
The third truth I have learned is to let God help you stand. This weekend we talked about how we each have such different stories, but God helps us all the same.
I have found that I relate to the paralyzed man in John 5. While I have no physical disability, I struggle with being frozen in my own anxiety.
In John 5, Jesus looks at the paralyzed man and asks him "Do you want to get well?". I realize now that my answer to this question was "no" for such a long time.
I allowed my anxiety and panic attacks to become who I was, which is strange considering the level of pain they cause. I decided for myself that even though I hated it, anxiety was my struggle. It was my pain that I would deal with, and my burden to carry.
Jesus was waiting for my answer when asking if I want to be well, and it took far too long for me to say yes. Jesus had been waiting for me to want Him to make me well instead of figuring it out on my own. Eventually, He picked me up from my anxiety and the hole I began to find false comfort in. While anxiety is something that I still struggle with, it has become so much more bearable and rare when I do face it.
God shows us His perfect example of love, and He calls us to respond the same to those around us. In order to do this, we must let go of the pieces of our broken life and allow Him to shine through the cracks. This weekend has been so refreshing and needed, and I am excited to see what else God has planned!
"In this world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world" (John 16:33)
Terrific words to hear this Monday morning Amanda, thank you. God truly is at work in you and gives you the words to express his works in you so that they may also be a guide to others. I am so thankful you were able to be a part of the Sonora DNow. The ladies were fortunate in having you and I know they blessed you as well.
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