This week has been crazy. It's had some pretty extreme highs and lows already, and as always, I know this semester is going to be in need of a whole lot of coffee and Jesus!
Last week at vertical, TA asked us what we are hungry for: love, acceptance, good grades, rest, significance.
Wow. I didn't realize until that moment how much I hunger for significance. Without realizing it, I feel like this craving was affecting so many different parts of my life.
As a senior in college, here are a few areas that I let the need for significance take over:
Friendships: I'm really good at doubting myself. I have some of the most incredible friends, but I take the small things to heart. This can be good when the small things are positive, but I overthink the negative. I know that words of affirmation is one of my top love languages, but I began to use that as an excuse to start doubting my value as a friend and questioning what I actually have to offer others if I wasn't receiving that constant affirmation.
Future: As a senior, this one is terrifying. I am striving to follow God's plan for my life, but when doors open, it's important to know that He is the one that opened them. A good grade, acceptance into a grad school, or a compliment from a mentor is great, but they are great because it is confirmation in God's path. If I crave these things for the wrong reason, every time I get a bad grade or a rejection letter from an internship, I will be crushed because I am searching for significance in the world's eyes instead of His.
Singleness: This can be a big one, and I know that I am not alone in this. I've realized that my desire to feel significant makes me crave attention from the opposite sex, especially in a world of social media that is consumed with photos and statuses about relationships, engagements, and weddings. It is entirely too easy to find self-worth in the compliments and attention from a boy, but to loose self-worth without these things.
You begin to desire having a person that you are confident will be there through everything. Share your joys, hold your heart when you're upset, listen to all of your thoughts and fears, and love you unconditionally. Someone that holds you at such high value that for you, they would take a bullet...
...or a nail?
For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16)
How can it be possible that the things I desire the most are right there in the most well known verse of the Bible?
We all look for our significance in the wrong places. Friends, family, work, school, body image, sports, you name it.
The root of Christianity is that each one of us is so significant to Christ that He gave HIS LIFE so that we could experience eternal joy with Him.
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows. (Matthew 10:29-31)
Sometimes it's easy to feel lost in a crowd and wonder if anyone notices you, but the very One that CREATED every person in that crowded room, as well as every person that has ever and will ever live, finds you incredibly significant.
He created you and said it was GOOD.
Each one of our sins nailed Him to that cross, and He asked God to FORGIVE us.
He rose and instead of showing bitterness for being killed by us, He commanded His disciples to spread the good news so that YOU could hear about His love.
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:37-39)
I don't know about you, but I'm feeling pretty significant. The God we serve is so great that His acceptance is fulfilling, never-ending, and life-changing.
Amanda, that really spoke to my heart. When things are going ninety to nothing all around and we're seeking attention from the wrong people..and not staying close to the God who sent His only son to die for us, we really need to think about who we should please. To read this from a college senior is very impressive and shows so much maturity....in yourself and in your walk with our Lord. I know your family is proud of you....and I appreciate you letting God's light shine through you.
ReplyDeleteAmanda, that really spoke to my heart. When things are going ninety to nothing all around and we're seeking attention from the wrong people..and not staying close to the God who sent His only son to die for us, we really need to think about who we should please. To read this from a college senior is very impressive and shows so much maturity....in yourself and in your walk with our Lord. I know your family is proud of you....and I appreciate you letting God's light shine through you.
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